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Showing posts with label limits. Show all posts
Showing posts with label limits. Show all posts

Formspring - A Slave Question

Should a Dom in a Master/slave relationship be able to bring other women into the relationship just because he is Master?

First let me say that I think this is outside of my realm.  I am not, nor have I ever been, involved in a Master/slave relationship.  There is much more control and oversight in this type relationship.  I don't want that.  It's not for me or who I am.  So, I can't speak from experience on this, but I will give my thoughts.  I also thought this would be a good chance for other to give their thoughts and opinions in the comments. 

I want to take a minute to make a few distinctions.  To me, the wording in this question is all over the map.  For me personally, I look at each name as a different characteristic, name being Dominant or Master, while many people tend to use these interchangeably.  To me, Dominant and submissive go together, while Master and slave go together, hence the abbreviations we see all the time, D/s and M/s.  Although, in the community, someone looked at as very experienced and knowledgeable, can be referred to as a Master.  I know it's confusing. 

In the context of this question, I think it's more important to look at the difference between a submissive and a slave.  A submissive is someone who submits to a Dominant and needs to be lead and guided.  She likes having someone control her to a degree.  She gives of herself for his pleasure and direction, and defers most control to him.  Yet, this may not be completely and fully, and she still has rights, and can say no at any time.  She can have limits and it is expected for those limits to be obliged.  A slave, on the other hand, has consensually given up all of her rights.  She is owned by her Master, has no right to refuse or say no, and is at his total mercy.  This is a choice she has chosen, and a right she has given her Master...to own her without question.  Period!  She has no limits and accepts that she could be subjected to anything of her Master's choosing.

Now let's go back to me saying I will give my view and opinion on this topic.  To me, every aspect of the relationship is negotiated.  If I want to introduce a new aspect to our relationship, it is discussed, or at least has been at some point previously.  If I now my submissive does not want it and will fight me on it, then I will not bring it in just because I want to do so.  To me that is wrong and in violation of the trust she has for me.  That is how I view and go about situations such as this. 

In theory, based on having total control, a Master does not have to ask his slave.  He can do as he chooses, whether this is some new kind of activity or bringing someone else into the relationship.  As a slave, she has given up her right to disagree with this.  It is his choice and his choice alone.  There is no arguing about it...his way is the only way...in theory.  I think that prior to any M/s relationship, or any type power exchange relationship, how things are handled and what is expected of each should be worked out in the beginning.  DO NOT become a slave before understanding fully what you are getting yourself into.  All of these understandings should be laid out before moving forward. 

I'm sure my readers and followers will be happy to chime in with their thoughts.  Two that come to mind, that I hope will give their two cents worth on this, are Mouse and Omega.  They are the two that come to mind that could really answer this question.  I for one, look forward to seeing what others think about this topic.

DV


Needles and Piercings

I consider myself a open minded person.  I tend to be able to look at a lot of things others find offensive, and maintain an objective view.  I try to comprehend situations that I don't have a clear understanding about.  Yet, as a Dominant, there are certain things I just don't get.  There are certain things that do not interest me and I don't want to participate in.  I guess in TTWD, these things would be called limits, and for me they would be hard limits. 

More specifically, this post is about needle play and piercings.  At least I guess that is what you would call it.  I'm not talking about piercings of ears, nipples or genitals.  I'm talking about piercings up and down your whole body.  In needle play, this would be needles up and down a big portion of your body.  Let me say that I do see an artistic side to some of this...multiple piercings, with ribbon run through them, to look like a corset...needles all along the side of a woman's body.  It can have an interesting look to it. 

Don't know what I'm talking about?  Well, you know I'm going to attach pictures for you.  In these pictures, I can see a certain artistic flair.  And maybe it's not much different than some people getting tattoos, or more standard piercings.  I'll just say that as much as I may see the artistry in this, it's not something which I would ever want to participate.  I would never ask or require a woman to mark and pierce her body in such a way that would leave permanent marks such as this. 

So, what are your thoughts on this?  Tell me your opinions and point of view.  I'm curious how others may see this.
















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